Multiple Sclerosis: I'm so tired! Fatigue and MS
I'm tired of MS and I'm just plain tired
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I cannot tell you; I cannot begin to tell you how tired I am of living with multiple sclerosis
I'm tired of shots and infusions and injection site reactions.
I'm tired of the MRI tunnel.
I'm tired of explaining why I don't have my cane one day and have it another.
I'm tired of asking people for money for our cause.
I'm tired of wondering when I go to bed what I'll wake up with the next day.
I'm tired of the pain and the numbness.
I'm tired of the weakness and the rigidity.
I'm tired of the lack of sensation and the hypersensitivity.
I'm tired of the juxtaposition and diametric opposition of MS.
I'm tired of my friends slipping and sliding down a slope and it being called progression.
I'm tired of my brain working so hard to find new pathways to get information to my body that I lay awake half the night.
I'm tired of taking drugs to help me sleep that do not work and leave me too groggy to get anything done when 2:30 A.M. finds me awake, but not able.
I am TIRED of living with MS but it's still better than the alternative. I'm tired, and that's O.K.
Some time we all need a moment to say those things; the strong need a time and a place to be weak. I've taken a chance here today. Over the next month, those words will be looked at tens of thousands of times. I've taken that dark little place that we all hold for ourselves; the place to which we retreat at the darkest times, and I've made it public.
I'm inviting you to do the same.
This isn't a pity party; No, quite the opposite.
I think it's quite empowering to let it out now and again. Like that little regulator on a pressure cooker. A pressure cooker can do a most efficient job; cooking foods in a fraction of conventional time. If pressure isn't released now and again, however, the super-efficient device becomes a bomb!
Take a deep breath with me and let it all out for a moment. I am surprised by how much better I feel getting that out and off my chest. You don't have to sign your name (or in our case put type in your name into the name field), we don't really care.
Lighten the load, dump some of the baggage, blow off some steam. This is my blog version of the primal screem.
Seriously, I'm ready to go on living with MS because, as a dear man to me once said, Better bad breath than no breath. Ain't it the truth?
Wishing you and your family the best of health.
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